A teacher’s take on positive teacher-student relationships…
Not many teachers (or students!) would argue against a happy classroom. A learning environment in which students are engaged and feel supported. A positive environment that leads to higher academic achievement. A friendly classroom. Quality student-teacher relationships that improve not only learning, but the whole education experience.
So, after reading Kath Murdoch’s post “Do you know me well enough to teach me?” I had the thought, perhaps Primary Schools do the whole ‘relationships thing’ better than High Schools do. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not criticising High School teachers; actually I think there might be a few things that stop them from developing the same quality, positive relationships with their students as their Primary counterparts…
1. Not enough contact time… Aka. “I only see them a few times a week!”Primary School teachers see their students almost all day, every day. Primary School teachers have all the time in the world to ‘start the year slowly’. We could give up a whole month to building relationships, developing a class culture, developing norms and protocols and getting to know our students. Some High School teachers might see their students for just a couple of hours a week. When, then, is all this ‘relationship building’ supposed to occur? Besides, wouldn’t a teenager’s parents be outraged if they found out their child has spent all that time on the warm and fuzzies, rather than actual learning?! Also, we can’t forget the fact that High School teachers have many students in many classes, whereas the average Primary teacher has just 25.
2. The importance of relationships is taken for granted… Aka. “They’re teenagers. They shouldn’t need that warm and fuzzy crap!”This follows on from point 1 I suppose. By the time kids are High School students, the onus is placed firmly on them to be engaged with their learning, their peers, their teachers. When kids are little we actually teach them explicitly how to make friends and teachers spend an awful lot of time getting to know each child personally, as people, not just learners. We do this so that we’re invested in their development and that they know this. We do this so that we can personalise the learning experience for them. Teenagers should just got on with their work, shouldn’t they?
3. The students are over it… Aka. “Teenagers hate everyone and everything!”Yep, teenagers are surly zombies! The only thing they like about school is their friends, if they’re lucky enough o have some. They hate learning. They hate homework. They hate adults - their teachers and heck, they hate their parents most of all! How on Earth is some daggy teacher meant to get through to these grumpy beings?
4. Teachers aren’t there to be their students’ best friend… Aka. “I need to maintain the power”
We all experienced a Miss Trunchbull-type teacher at some time during our own schooling. There’s a growing body of research that says the way to get through to students is through building positive relationships, featuring a few key ingredients. Care. Warmth. Empathy. Respect. Trust. This is at loggerheads with the traditional description of a teacher. Dare I say, if a teacher has quality relationships with their students comprising such ingredients, it does away with the need for ‘power’.
Anyway, High School teachers, I’d love to hear your thoughts! Like I said, it certainly isn’t an attack. What barriers stand in your way, building relationships with your students? If you’ve broken the mould and do have great relationships with your students, how have you done it?
There’s a whole lot of articles, blog posts and research to read on the topic of Teacher-Student Relationships. Click here, here, here, here, here or here to read more!
Teachling <WordPress> <Tumblr>
More on ‘relationships’ from Teachling: A teacher’s take on parent-teacher relationships…
A teacher’s take on respecting teachers, pt2…
A teacher’s take on respecting teachers, pt1…
A teacher’s take on earning respect from students…
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationships. Show all posts
Wednesday, 4 December 2013
Saturday, 26 October 2013
Parent-Teacher Relationships: From respectful, to indifferent, to just plain rude!
A teacher’s take on parent-teacher relationships…
Parents, who do you have a better relationship with – your hairdresser or your child’s teacher? The profound and lasting impact that a positive, respectful parent-teacher relationship has on a child’s learning and determining their life-chances, is often rarely realised.
A teacher’s life is dedicated to facilitating a supportive, positive environment in which all children can be challenged to achieve their best in all areas of social, emotional, physical, behavioural and cognitive learning. Too many parents are at best indifferent toward their child’s teacher, and in some cases are just plain disrespectful, untrusting and rude (I’d guess that all teachers have had to deal with, as a minimum, some form of verbal abuse from parents at some stage of their career).
My last three posts have all explored the idea of respect for teachers – the importance of students respecting their teachers and the lack for respect for teachers from society in general. I’ve missed a major stake-holder in the education business, so I’ll use this post to address them… parents! How well do you know your child’s teacher? Do you respect them? Do you trust them? How often do you communicate with them positively?
Read this popular Ron Clark CNN article (plus a follow-up article here). The open letter to parents called for parents to “be a partner instead of a prosecutor” and to “have our backs, and we need you to give us the respect we deserve”. “We know you love your children. We love them, too”.
Alternatively, if you want to read a colourful rebuttal, read this Laurie A. Couture post which includes claims that “Teachers routinely inflict an environment of chronic physical and emotional distress on children” and that school children are held as “hostages, against their wills” by “factory-like” schools that force “the population to deny the self, homogenize, obey and consume… ignor[ing] their bodies, emotions, passions, interests, questions, ideas, creative impulses, purposes and needs”.
Yikes! All I can say is for the sake of teachers everywhere, I’m glad Couture’s son is, as she terms it, “unschooled” because imagine if she was a parent of one of your pupils. Perhaps parents need reminding that a teacher’s priority is to do what’s in the best interests of the child. We’re not the bad guys we’re sometimes made out to be. We’re not in it for the holidays, as some people believe. We’re obviously not in it for the money. We’re teachers because we care about children. Surely that’s worth some respect?
- Teachling < Wordpress> <Tumblr>
Image source link
The ‘respect’ series from Teachling:A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt2...
A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt1...
A teacher's take on earning respect from students...
Parents, who do you have a better relationship with – your hairdresser or your child’s teacher? The profound and lasting impact that a positive, respectful parent-teacher relationship has on a child’s learning and determining their life-chances, is often rarely realised.

My last three posts have all explored the idea of respect for teachers – the importance of students respecting their teachers and the lack for respect for teachers from society in general. I’ve missed a major stake-holder in the education business, so I’ll use this post to address them… parents! How well do you know your child’s teacher? Do you respect them? Do you trust them? How often do you communicate with them positively?
Read this popular Ron Clark CNN article (plus a follow-up article here). The open letter to parents called for parents to “be a partner instead of a prosecutor” and to “have our backs, and we need you to give us the respect we deserve”. “We know you love your children. We love them, too”.
Alternatively, if you want to read a colourful rebuttal, read this Laurie A. Couture post which includes claims that “Teachers routinely inflict an environment of chronic physical and emotional distress on children” and that school children are held as “hostages, against their wills” by “factory-like” schools that force “the population to deny the self, homogenize, obey and consume… ignor[ing] their bodies, emotions, passions, interests, questions, ideas, creative impulses, purposes and needs”.
Yikes! All I can say is for the sake of teachers everywhere, I’m glad Couture’s son is, as she terms it, “unschooled” because imagine if she was a parent of one of your pupils. Perhaps parents need reminding that a teacher’s priority is to do what’s in the best interests of the child. We’re not the bad guys we’re sometimes made out to be. We’re not in it for the holidays, as some people believe. We’re obviously not in it for the money. We’re teachers because we care about children. Surely that’s worth some respect?
- Teachling < Wordpress> <Tumblr>
Image source link
The ‘respect’ series from Teachling:A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt2...
A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt1...
A teacher's take on earning respect from students...
Monday, 14 October 2013
What do kids think of me?
A teacher’s take on earning
respect from students…
Be warm. Care. Laugh. Be human.
Loosen the reigns, but don’t lose control.
At least, that’s what I believe… Relationships need to be positive and productive, built on trust and mutual goals. ‘Expectations’ refers to a demand for excellence. All students can learn and it’s a teacher’s role to help kids achieve their potential.
A teacher's take on independence and helicopter parents...
A teacher's take on the jargon of explicit teaching...
A teacher's take on "How Children Learn"...
A teacher's take on self-help and parenting advice...
A teacher's take on blogs...
Access Teachling:
Teachling’s Wordpress, Teachling’s Blog.com, Teachling’s Blogspot, Teachling's Tumblr
Image source: http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2010/232/4/3/My_Crazy_Class_XD_by_3Peoples.png
Be warm. Care. Laugh. Be human.
Loosen the reigns, but don’t lose control.
I’m not interested in whether my students want to be my
besties. I don’t care if they think I’m cool (which is lucky because I just
ooze daggy!). I don’t care if they ‘like’ me, but I do care whether or not they
respect me.
Great relationship + High expectations = Respect.At least, that’s what I believe… Relationships need to be positive and productive, built on trust and mutual goals. ‘Expectations’ refers to a demand for excellence. All students can learn and it’s a teacher’s role to help kids achieve their potential.
Great relationship + Lack of expectations = Friend, not a
teacher.
Lack of relationship + High Expectations = 1950’s teacher (good luck in the 21st century!)
Lack of relationship + Lack of expectations = Indifference (why bother being a teacher)
To me, teachers need to actively build positive and productive relationships with their students, whilst also having the highest expectations for learning. I believe that it’s possible, for you to have excellent working relationships with your students, but that does not mean a teacher needs to compromise on their expectations for learning. In fact, surely the higher the quality of the student-teacher relationships, the higher the quality of the learning environment, the higher the quality of the learning.
Lack of relationship + High Expectations = 1950’s teacher (good luck in the 21st century!)
Lack of relationship + Lack of expectations = Indifference (why bother being a teacher)
To me, teachers need to actively build positive and productive relationships with their students, whilst also having the highest expectations for learning. I believe that it’s possible, for you to have excellent working relationships with your students, but that does not mean a teacher needs to compromise on their expectations for learning. In fact, surely the higher the quality of the student-teacher relationships, the higher the quality of the learning environment, the higher the quality of the learning.
If you’re a teacher, do you think your students respect you?
Do you think it matters? Have you earned it?
If you’re a parent, do your children respect their teacher?
Does it matter? Do you respect their
teacher?
As a starting point, this post lists 10 key ways to build a
respectful relationship with students [http://whatedsaid.wordpress.com/2010/08/28/10-ways-to-get-your-students-respect/].
I’ve come across a few other pieces recently that talk about student respect
for teachers, such as this article comparing respect levels for teachers in
countries around the world [http://www.theguardian.com/teacher-network/teacher-blog/2013/oct/03/teachers-rated-worldwide-global-survey],
or this article which speaks the truth about teachers nowadays needing to ‘earn’
respect, unlike years gone by [http://www.educationworld.com/a_curr/columnists/martin/martin011.shtml],
or this blog entry which begins, “Dear students, Your teachers are not out to
get you, I promise…” [http://itsssnix.tumblr.com/post/62952676811/dear-students].
- Teachling
More from Teachling:
A
teacher's take on positive thoughts and how kids let negative thoughts consume
them...A teacher's take on independence and helicopter parents...
A teacher's take on the jargon of explicit teaching...
A teacher's take on "How Children Learn"...
A teacher's take on self-help and parenting advice...
A teacher's take on blogs...
Access Teachling:
Teachling’s Wordpress, Teachling’s Blog.com, Teachling’s Blogspot, Teachling's Tumblr
Image source: http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2010/232/4/3/My_Crazy_Class_XD_by_3Peoples.png
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)