Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts

Monday, 14 April 2014

(More) Handy Hints For Helping Children Learn At Home, Pt.2

A teacher’s take on how you can help your child succeed…
No. 6. “Know Your Child’s ‘Down time’”Here, Andrew Fuller isn’t referring to that relaxing ‘down time’ we have when we’re surrounded by candles, having a bath with a glass of vino. He’s talking of the time at which you don’t learn new information as well as you do at other times. “As a rough guide, think of the time they go to sleep, then think of the time they usually wake up, calculate the midpoint of their sleep, add twelve hours and around that time is their “down time”. For example, if your child sleeps from 9.30 pm to 7 am, the midpoint of their sleep is 2.00 am. Adding twelve hours takes us to 2.00 pm”. 2.00 pm therefore, is the time at which that child’s brain is in ‘downtime’, switching off and least likely to be primed for quality learning. This is the perfect time to engage in hands on activities, play, relaxation, crafts, sport and other activities that are less taxing on the ‘academic’ parts of the brain.
No. 7 “Eat a good breakfast”“If your Mum ever said have fish or eggs for breakfast because it’s brain food, she was right! As long as it’s medically safe to do so, a breakfast that is high in protein (think cheese, milk, bacon, eggs) and lower in carbohydrates (think cereal, orange juice and toast) promotes concentration and learning. Also encourage your child to drink lots of water- the brain runs on it! Students who don’t eat breakfast are not only more likely to gain weight; they will also have to work harder than others to do well at school.” Ew, fish for breakfast. I think parents can exercise common sense here. Obviously, Coco Pops every day for breakfast – although delish! – are not the best choice. Or worse, no breakfast at all. Give your child the right fuel!
No. 7 “Use Music”“There is a growing evidence to suggest that playing instrumental music softly in the background enhances learning.” Avoid music that’s likely to be distracting, such as pop songs that they’ll want to just sing along to, instead of knuckling in to their homework!
No. 8 “Use aromas”“Most people have had the experience of smelling a particular aroma and having a series of memories flood back. Partly this is because your olfactory nerve is directly linked to the hippocampus, which is the part of your brain where memories are integrated. The aromas most often associated with improvements in concentration and memory are lemon, basil and rosemary.”
No. 9 “Monitor their use of video and computer games”“Video games are incredibly popular and give a sense of great mastery, challenge and involvement. Boys particularly use video games in a social way. It is important to realise that the use of video and computer games is not completely passive. Too much playing of these games can be negative. These games can be so compelling they become addictive. While some games require quite intricate problem solving, the skills learned on these games do not appear to readily transfer into other arenas of life. Very few of the games require creative problem solving or an opportunity to be an active participant in determining a story line. Some exposure to computer games is good. Too much, though, can be toxic. Sadly, there is no research that tells us what the right amount of time spent of computer games should be so you’ll need to think about the balance of your child’s life and their range of activities and interests.” Treat TV similarly.
No. 10. “Help them to build the essentials skills for success”“Three of the skills needed for success at school (and in most areas of life) are concentration, memory and sequencing or getting things in the right order. The games that parents play with their children such as Snap, Uno, Concentration, Battleships, Monopoly, Chess, Jigsaw puzzles all play an incredibly important role in developing these skills of success. Computer versions of these games are not as effective in helping children develop these skills. To really help your child to succeed at school every so often switch off the TV, unplug the computer and pull out a game.”
No. 11. “Limit the amount of part-time work”“Senior secondary students should not work more than ten hours a week at a part-time job. If they do so, there is clear evidence that their marks will suffer.”
Download the summary at http://www.andrewfuller.com.au/free/AndrewFullersHandyHints.pdf, extracted from Andrew Fuller's “Help Your Child Succeed At School”.
Also read this post I reblogged, about What NOT To Do If You Want Your Child To Succeed, based on the article The Overprotected Kid.
What other Handy Hints for improving learning at home do you know of? Please share them in the comments section below!
Teachling<Wordpress> < Twitter>

Handy Hints For Helping Children Learn At Home, Pt.1

A teacher’s take on how you can help your child succeed…
It's Parenting 101. Limiting TV time, making sure your child gets plenty of sleep and helping them set up a designated learning space. Yes, it’s common sense. But hey, it doesn’t hurt to be reminded.
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It goes without saying that a school isn’t the only place learning occurs. You’ve previously heard my thoughts on why I’m not fond of homeworkand that I think kids should get more opportunities to play and just be kids, but alas, parents are always asking me what they can do, to help their child’s learning. It’s actually a question I love to hear as it demonstrates a parent’s understanding that learning is a partnership between home and school; child, family and teacher. Naturally, different children need extra help with different academic areas, but this list – based on Andrew Fuller's “Help Your Child Succeed At School” – outlines the basics.
  1. Most Learning Doesn’t Happen At School!
    “Children spend only 15% of their time at school. They spend more time asleep (33%) than they do at school. Most of their time (52%) is at home, awake, mucking around, playing, and learning about life and it’s what they do with that time that is important.” Remember that you play a much great role in your child’s education than their teacher.
  2. The Learning Space – Getting OrganisedWork with your child to create a dedicated space where they can do homework, projects and read. As you know from their bedroom, kids have trouble keeping things neat and tidy! They’ll need help with this initially, but you can help them figure out ways of keeping their stationary in order, the workspace clear and clutter free.
  1. The Learning Space – Lighting“Natural or indirect lighting such as a desk lamp is best for learning. It is best for your child not to study under fluorescent lighting as it is related to raised cortisol levels in the blood stream (an indicator of anxiety and agitation). Cortisol also suppresses language functions.”
  1. Limit TV/ Computer/ iPad Time, Of course!Don’t make them go cold turkey. An hour and a half per day is plenty. That’s not to say they should be doing ‘homework’ for the rest of the time: Arts, crafts, playing outside, listening to and making music, socialising, relaxing, family time, the list goes on. Oh, and keep electronics out of the bedroom and away from their ‘learning space’.
  2. Plenty Of Sleep!“A good nights sleep (at least 8 hours) is essential for optimal brain functioning at school. Memory consolidation occurs during sleep especially during dream (or REM) sleep. During the normal 8-9 hours of sleep, five dream (REM) cycles occur. Adolescents getting only 5-6 hours of sleep lose out on the last two REM cycles and thereby reduce the amount of time the brain has to consolidate information.Teenagers need as much sleep as children, partly because their brains are doing so much development. Always remember there is no such thing as a sleep bank. So just because you slept 10 hours one night doesn’t mean you can get away with only sleeping six hours the next night. Students who don’t get enough sleep have to work much harder to do well at school.”
 Follow http://teachling.wordpress.com/  to read Handy Hints For Helping Children Learn At Home, Pt.2.
Teachling<Wordpress> < Twitter>
Download the full summary of Andrew Fuller’s version at http://www.andrewfuller.com.au/free/AndrewFullersHandyHints.pdf.
Image sourced from here

Friday, 11 April 2014

What does 6x4 mean?

A teacher’s take on visualising multiplication…
I saw this blog post a while ago on reflectivemaths and after commenting, put it aside. However, recently working on some early multiplication concepts with my own students has brought it back to mind.
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So, does 6×4 mean 6 lots of 4 or 4 lots of 6?
The reply by the above-mentioned blogger was “bearing in mind the answers the same of course. I’d say you start with 6 and then multiply by 4. So 4 lots of 6
That makes a lot of sense. Though, my initial response is that I visualise 6×4  as “6 fours”. “x” essentially meaning “lots of”, rather than “times”. As in, 6×4 is 6 lots of 4, or 6 times 4 things (6 packets of 4 pens) rather than 6 things times 4 (4 packets of 6 pens). But yes, regardless, we still get 24 pens either way!
My school has been working with a Maths coach on childrens’ misconceptions, and multiplication is always a confusing topic. To try and stop confusing our students, we talk multiplication in terms of “6 fours” rather than “6 times 4” or “6 lots of 4”. This aims to take the confusion out of the “x”. Further, “6 fours” acknowledges 4 as it’s own whole. Whereas, the 4 in “6 times 4” means children are seeing it as “4 ones”. Basically, why can’t 4 be it’s own being (first version)? Why should 4 only ever be seen as a quantity of ones (second version)? In saying that though, the 4 pens I mentioned above still labels poor 4 as 4 ones.
Again though, the answer is still 24, no matter which way you look at it.
Thinking in terms of ‘repeat addition’ – the concept I was working on with my 7 year olds – do you see 6×4 as essentially 4+4+4+4+4+4 or 6+6+6+6?
What about those good old “times tables”? Going through the 2s, for example, do you start with “1×2=2, 2×2 =4, 3×2=6, 4×2=8”? Or “2×1=2, 2×2=4, 2×3=6, 2×4=8”? Again, even though the answers are of course the same, I think the way you say it makes a huge difference to how the concept is visualised. Hence why, again to try and stop misconceptions, we do 2s as doubles now. That is, “double 1 is 2, double 2 is 4, double 3 is 6, double 4 is 8”.
Maybe the best solution is just to present young children with all possibilities, so that at the end of the day, they can ‘connect’ with whichever way they prefer. 6×4 might be “6 times 4”, “6 lots of 4”, “6 fours”, “6+6+6+6”, “4+4+4+4+4+4”, arrays, maybe even “double double 6”. If the answer is the same, does it matter how we get there?
Teachling<WordPress> < Twitter>

Friday, 14 February 2014

The highs and lows of teaching: From making a difference, building great relationships and shaping the future, to homework, reports and helicopter parents.

A teacher’s reflection on 6 months of blogging…

13,000 words later and I feel like I’ll never get sick of posting. Over the past 6 months I’ve had the joy of having some good chats with fellow educators like the experienced, very enthusiastic and full-of-ideas Norah Colvin, to new teachers such as the very switched-on and similarly enthusiastic Cultivating Questioners, as well as blogs such as ijstock and Cognition Education. Let’s admit it, every blogger loves to get comments! When a comment comes through from people of the same wavelength as you, it’s always exciting, isn’t it!

More than a chance to network, hear from other people that are passionate about education (teachers and parents alike) and learn new things, blogging is a great chance to just hammer your thoughts out on a keyboard, send them into cyberspace and get things off your chest. Particularly when you work in a profession which is constantly evolving, and which there seems as though there’ll never be a manual on ‘how to teach’. Therefore, all schools do things differently and of course, you’re never going to agree with everything that goes on within your school and system. It’s always nice to hear you’re not the only one!

I started this blog to share My 2 Cents on a range of education-related topics. Long story short, one of my rabbits was sick, and after consulting ‘Dr Google’, I discovered that hardly any professionals post useful advice relating to their profession online. I felt, as a teacher, that I could easily write about what I do, and that it might help a parent, a teacher, anyone. Thus began, “A teacher’s take…”

A teacher's take on why schools should scrap 'grades', and give kids real 'feedback'...
A teacher's take on rethinking education...
Ken Robinson's take on how we should be viewing education...
Ken Robinson's take on schools, and how they kill creativity...
A teacher's take on letting kids play...
A teacher's take on positive teacher-student relationships...
A teacher's take on student reports... And why they're a waste of my time!
A teacher's take on homework...
An Australian teacher's take on America's Common Core...
A teacher's take on parent-teacher relationships...
A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt2...
A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt1...
A teacher's take on earning respect from students...
A teacher's take on positive thoughts and how kids let negative thoughts consume them...
A teacher's take on independence and helicopter parents...
A teacher's take on the jargon of explicit teaching...
A teacher's take on "How Children Learn"...
A teacher's take on self-help and parenting advice...
A teacher's take on blogs...

Teachling <Wordpress> < Twitter>

 

 

Ding, Ding, Ding - Why are half my students still not here?

 
A teacher’s take on getting your kids to school on time… And why it’s the least you can do.
 
A couple of weeks into the new school year here in Australia and one thing is frustrating me more than assessments, meetings and a new bunch of rascals combined. PARENTS! Specifically, why is it so darn hard to get your kid to school on time? Seriously?! 9am can’t be that hard, considering we teachers are there before 8am every day (That may come as a surprise to those that think we work 9-3:30, hehe).
 
Before I rant, let me chuck in some quotes, to prove it’s not just me… Michael Grose’s Parenting Ideas website is fantastic if you haven’t explored it already. He says here that “School absenteeism is a huge problem in Australia – and much of it is parent-condoned”. Shockingly, the average student misses 12-15 days of school each year (doesn’t sound like that much really, however…), which equates to a full school year lost over the span of their education. Yikes!
 
Grose continues that “Australian kids spend only 15% of their total time at school. They spend more time asleep than they do at school. So we need to maximise every day to get full value. That means turning up to school every day, on time”. There are always a few stragglers, coming into class late, whose parents bring them to the door after the bell has gone, give them their cuddles, say their goodbyes, holding up the start of the school day for the whole class. One day last week, we didn’t actually start the school day until 9:07 (Even then, one boy didn’t arrive until 9:45!). When the bell rang at 9am (following a ‘warning bell’ at 8:57) only half of my class were present! Let’s say though, very conservatively, that the beginning of my class’s school day is held up for just 2 minutes each day. That’s almost 7 hours missed across the year; more than a full school day.
 
Last year I had a perpetually late mother get stroppy with me for, and I quote, “You don’t acknowledge me in the mornings when I bring _ into the class!” For real? You bring your son into class late every day and you want me to engage you in conversation, despite that fact that you’re contributing to the whole class losing more than a full day of school this year?

Punctuality isn’t just about teachers griping about a lost couple of minutes. It affects all students in a class and is a problem all around the world, with some UK schools beginning to issue fines to parents of tardy students!
 
Parents, get your kids to school on time. Better yet, get them to school 5 or 10 minutes early. That will give them a chance to have a chat to their buddies, maybe have a quick run-around outside, unpack their bags and come into class to get settled. They’re ready to start the school day when the bell rings.
 
The alternative is to rush around in the morning, get them to school late, give them no time to socialise and get settled, and come into class late, embarrassed and ashamed that the whole class is waiting on them and that they haven’t had time to organise their belongings.
 
Why it’s the least [many parents] could do:
No doubt ‘Parent’ is becoming fewer and fewer peoples’ full-time job.  Most parents now are so-called ‘working parents’. Of course this means you’re going to be busy, busy, busy. Not only are you thinking about your child constantly and caring for them; organising play-dates, planning dinner, getting the kids to their sport games, music lessons, trying to get on top of the house-work. You’re also holding down your own job, rushing around to meetings and so on. As a result, more and more parents are taking a hands-off approach to their child’s formal education. With less time in your day, you might not be able to get to school during the day to help in the classroom or attend excursions. With nights a blur, parents are often telling me there’s no time for homework (if you’ve read my post about homework you’ll know that I’m not too fussed about that, anyway!), and are often too busy or tired to get to school for parent-teacher meetings and information nights. If you’re one of these parents – and rest assured I am by no means ‘having a dig’ at you – then, at the very least, the extend of your involvement with your child’s schooling is making sure they’re at school every day, and that they’re there on time.
 
Teachers are there to support you and help you give your child the best possible start to their life. Sometimes, you need to help us to help them. Get your kids to school on time.
 
Teachling <Wordpress> <Tumblr> < Twitter>
 
More from Teachling:
 
Further reading:
 

Sunday, 8 December 2013

Let Kids Be Kids pt.2

A teacher’s take on letting kids play…

“Play is what children do, when afforded the independence, opportunity, time and space to determine their own behaviour.” (Play For Life)

I almost called this post “A teacher’s take our ‘nanny society’, and why we seem so bent on destroying childhoods”, but then I thought it sounded too ‘preachy’. Anyway…

Everyone loves to reminisce on their time spent as a kid, riding bikes around the suburbs, playing impromptu sport championships in the streets, daydream of building an insanely cool tree-house and having a good hard crack at turning that dream into a reality, failing miserably but still loving it, having hobbies that we chose for ourselves, coming home after dark and fearing the wrath of your parents, making friends with anyone and everyone, always being able to find something to do on the weekend; loving every second of our freedom!

Let’s fast forward 20 years and see our current kids reflect on, um, rushing home from school and sitting on the couch and swiping away at their iPhones. We can’t blame them, though. Afterall, who is it that buys them their gadgets, restricts their freedom, schedules their lives to the minute, chooses their hobbies for them, ‘nanny’ them, ‘helicopter’? I’ve blogged previously about helicopter parenting and taking away freedom with over-scheduling, but what about taking away play?

Play is actually disappearing at a horrifying rate from childrens’ lives. Just think geographically for a moment. 40 years ago, children would stray far and wide from their home. Go to the beach or to a movie with a few friends and shock horror, no adults. Miles from home, building and crashing billy-carts and getting up to who-knows-what. 20 years ago, kids couldn’t get away with quite so much mischief, but could still hop on their bikes and feel free and safe to roam their local streets, meet up with pals and make sure they we home by dark. Now many children would not even be allowed outside of their own fence without their parent! Parents of young children, would you allow you child to get away with the far-reaching play that you spent your childhood doing? Certainly, you wouldn’t let them get up to the kind of play that your parents got up to. Gee, now that would just be downright bonkers, right? But honestly, why not?

The reduced role of play in childhoods is becoming such as epidemic in today’s nanny society that organisitions such as Play For Life are trying to actively get kids playing again. You know, real playing!  Using their imaginations, innovating, designing and making, cooperative play, socialising, experimenting and making mistakes, creating, physical play, outdoors play – the kind of play that is essential to learning.

As adults, what can we do?

We can provide children with the time to play. That is, don’t over-schedule kids. Even allow them to get bored as that will force them to truly direct their own play.
We can provide children with the space and freedom to play. Obviously this is dependent on where you live and safety must be a priority, but maybe we could loosen the harness.

We can provide children with the resources to play. For example, construction materials, balls, scooters, sketch pads, rather than iPhones or DVDs.
Leave the rest to them! Don’t assume we know what’s best. Let children make friends with the kids that they want and play the games that they want.

At the school I teach at, children aren’t allowed to bring swap cards to school in case they get upset over a ‘bad swap’. In other words, the kids aren’t resilient and we’re not doing them any favours by pandering to them. Kids aren’t allowed to play with sticks in case they use them as a weapon. In other words, the kids aren’t accustomed to physical play, but instead of teaching them how to play, we’re banning them from any rough-and-tumble in case someone gets hurt. No running is allowed on the quad in case someone falls over and scrapes their knees on the bitumen. In other words, we’re wrapping them in cotton wool instead of allowing them to discover their own limits. Yes, the list of things that children are allowed to do is getting smaller and in doing that, we’re taking away vital opportunities for them to learn, grow, be happy and make memories.

Let’s see non-adult-directed play re-enter childrens’ lives. Let’s give children the time, space, freedom and resources to play.

Still not convinced?  >>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vt7DoWmahu0 <<< (Language warning!)

Teachling <Wordpress> <Tumblr>

Friday, 15 November 2013

More Worthless Than a White Crayon

A teacher’s take on student reports… and why they are a waste of my time!

So, I’m here at my laptop (sitting on my bed with coffee and Oreos on my bedside table), hammering away at my keyboard at a million keystrokes-per-minute, trying to make a dent in my students’ end-of-year reports. I suspect all Australian teachers are busy doing much the same this weekend, and last weekend, and next weekend, and after school most nights for the next couple of weeks! I’m taking a quick break to punch out this post, wondering why the heck am I wasting soooooo much time on these worthless things?
 
Let me give just 3 reasons why they a waste of my time, and need I say more.

      1)      Student reports do not improve student learning

This one is obvious, is it not? Are there any parents out there who would actually say, “I get a report from my child’s teacher twice a year, and that piece of paper helps my child learn and achieve more!” Of course not, but let me cite some research just to come off more professional. If you haven’t heard of New Zealander (now living in Melbourne) John Hattie or heard of his work on “effect sizes” I urge you to look him up. Long story short, I don’t see reports anywhere on his list of factors which improve student learning outcomes. A few factors are sort of related, such as “Student Self-Reported Grades” which states that a student’s expectations of their own learning and the push for them to exceed those expectations improves their learning, “Formative Evaluation” which basically refers to the assessment used to inform teaching and learning, and “Feedback” information for teacher and more importantly,the student, on where they’re going, how they’re going and where to next*. Note that this last factor does not mean feedback given to a parent about what their kid has done at school for the last six months!

2)      Student reports take a teacher's time away from the things that matter

Consider the point above, now consider how much time teachers spend writing reports. Let’s conservatively say the average Primary School teacher spends an hour per child on their report, twice a year, with an average class size of 25. Now consider how those 50 hours could have been better spent planning teaching and developing brilliant learning experiences for their students, collecting resources, researching curriculum and pedagogy and so on. Just think of what a teacher could do to improve their pupils’ learning outcomes, if those 50 hours were returned to them!
 
3)      Student reports need to be so politically correct and full of jargon that parents can barely decipher what their child can actually do

Aside from the fact that any good parent already knows their child – duh – and is very likely to know their child better than their teacher anyway – duh – I don’t believe that reports accurately convey information about a child’s learning. At my school, for example, we are not allowed to say that a child “can” do something or “is able to” to do something - what the? We can’t say that a child “needs to” improve in a certain area, rather we have to say that their “future learning may be to…”. We can’t make subjective comments or say anything about their personality or personal attributes. Comments now need to be objective, specific, measurable and data-backed. Boring. PC. Useless.

Teachling <Wordpress> <Tumblr>

*Some of Hattie’s work:
Hattie, J. 2009. Visible learning: A synthesis of over 800 meta-analyses relating to achievement.
Hattie, J. 2003. Who says formative assessment matters: Formative and summative interpretations of assessment information.
Hattie, J. 2003. Distinguishing expert teachers from novice and experienced teachers: Teachers make a difference.


 

 

 

Friday, 8 November 2013

Let Kids Be Kids

A teacher’s take on homework…

Hands up if you loved doing homework when you were a kid… Nobody? Fair enough. Homework stinks, but it is so cemented in our idea of what children do that it seems to be here to stay. Somewhere, many years ago, some absolute liar spread the rumour that getting kids to do uninspiring worksheets on their own time, will improve their learning. Let me present some reasons why homework should be outlawed.

Firstly, kids these days are constantly busy, moving from one organised activity or event to the next and their days are planned to the minute. Take a class of 20 five-year-olds that I surveyed. Every single one of them stated that they partake in some form of ‘organised’ activity outside of school weekly, on a school day (ie. After school, Monday-Friday). 17/20 students participate in an organised sport weekly, outside of school on a school day (eg. basketball, football, swimming). Half of the students said they engaged in more than one organised activity weekly, outside of school on a school day (eg. Some combinations of instrumental music lessons, dance classes, tutoring, sport, art classes). Remember, THESE KIDS ARE FIVE!

Not only do we then deal with the obvious stress and exhaustion for coping at such a young age, with such busy schedules, but we’re forgetting a key point – letting kids be kids. A typical day might go something like 7am wake up, breakfast, brush teeth, get dressed, 8am-4pm school, 4pm home, afternoon tea, 4:30 swimming lesson, 5:30 dinner, 6pm homework, 7pm shower, 7:30 bed. I reiterate… This is a five-year-old’s schedule, so imagine what that of an eight-year-old or 14-year-old might look like.

Kids need time for playing with friends, and just as important is having time to play alone and be creative and use their imaginations. And what about some downtime to perhaps relax and watch some TV or do a drawing? We can’t forget that homework actually puts pressure on parents too, that are trying to juggle assisting their child with their homework (alongside everything else the child is doing), plus worrying about their own lives, jobs, finances, cooking dinner, keeping a tidy home, operating their chauffeur service and so on!
So, how can anything that makes children anxious, takes away the opportunities for them to experience regular ‘kid stuff’, all while giving them a negative experience of learning ever be considered a good thing? Oh, and here’s the kicker – teachers hate homework too because it takes an awful lot of our time away from doing things that actually improve student learning such as planning lessons, giving students feedback on their learning and actually teaching!


When done properly, I will admit that homework can be a valuable experience and create links between home and school whilst reinforcing and extending the child’s learning experiences. Homework can foster lifelong learning and study habits, responsibility for one’s own learning and develop organisation and time management skills.

Homework must be balanced with the range of home obligations, out of school recreational and social activity, cultural and family events and so on. Kids already spend most of their waking hours doing school work and much of the rest of their time is already planned. Homework becomes a chore, the dreaded elephant in the room and leads to stress, exhaustion and most negatively, it makes children hate learning and hate school. Parents always seem to think there is either too much homework or not enough and teachers can never please anyone. So what do we do about it? Don’t ask me. You didn’t expect me of offer solutions did you… I just felt like airing my grievance!

So, what do YOU think of the dreaded H-word?
 
Teachling <Wordpress> <Tumblr>

 More from Teachling:An Australian teacher's take on America's Common Core...
A teacher's take on positive thoughts and how kids let negative thoughts consume them...
A teacher's take on independence and helicopter parents...

Image sourcehttp://cdn.parenting.kidspot.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/hateshomework-600x420.jpg

Saturday, 26 October 2013

Parent-Teacher Relationships: From respectful, to indifferent, to just plain rude!

A teacher’s take on parent-teacher relationships…

Parents, who do you have a better relationship with – your hairdresser or your child’s teacher? The profound and lasting impact that a positive, respectful parent-teacher relationship has on a child’s learning and determining their life-chances, is often rarely realised.

A teacher’s life is dedicated to facilitating a supportive, positive environment in which all children can be challenged to achieve their best in all areas of social, emotional, physical, behavioural and cognitive learning. Too many parents are at best indifferent toward their child’s teacher, and in some cases are just plain disrespectful, untrusting and rude (I’d guess that all teachers have had to deal with, as a minimum, some form of verbal abuse from parents at some stage of their career).
My last three posts have all explored the idea of respect for teachers – the importance of students respecting their teachers and the lack for respect for teachers from society in general. I’ve missed a major stake-holder in the education business, so I’ll use this post to address them… parents! How well do you know your child’s teacher? Do you respect them? Do you trust them? How often do you communicate with them positively?       
               
Read this popular Ron Clark CNN article (plus a follow-up article here). The open letter to parents called for parents to “be a partner instead of a prosecutor” and to “have our backs, and we need you to give us the respect we deserve”. “We know you love your children. We love them, too”.
Alternatively, if you want to read a colourful rebuttal, read this Laurie A. Couture post which includes claims that “Teachers routinely inflict an environment of chronic physical and emotional distress on children” and that school children are held as “hostages, against their wills” by “factory-like” schools that force “the population to deny the self, homogenize, obey and consume… ignor[ing] their bodies, emotions, passions, interests, questions, ideas, creative impulses, purposes and needs”.

Yikes! All I can say is for the sake of teachers everywhere, I’m glad Couture’s son is, as she terms it, “unschooled” because imagine if she was a parent of one of your pupils. Perhaps parents need reminding that a teacher’s priority is to do what’s in the best interests of the child. We’re not the bad guys we’re sometimes made out to be. We’re not in it for the holidays, as some people believe. We’re obviously not in it for the money. We’re teachers because we care about children. Surely that’s worth some respect?

Teachling < Wordpress> <Tumblr>

Image source link

The ‘respect series from Teachling:A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt2...
A teacher's take on respecting teachers, pt1...
A teacher's take on earning respect from students...

Saturday, 5 October 2013

It was just 5 minutes out of 390!


A teacher’s take on positive thoughts… 
and how kids let negative thoughts consume them!


















Don’t kids usually believe what we tell them? So, if you tell them that they had a terrible day at school, did boring work, weren't allowed to be creative, were bullied or teased in the playground and got yelled at by their teacher, they’ll probably agree, wouldn't they? If you tell them that their day was amazing, full of fun, great times playing with great friends and learnt cool new things, they’ll probably agree with that too, wouldn't they?

I’m having this wondering following a conversation I had with a parent this week. Lucy's* mother came into my office before school to tell me all about an ‘incident’ that happened at lunch time the day before. Long story short, her 6 year old daughter felt excluded from a game some of her friends were playing. Alarm bells rang in my head when the mother next told me, “We talked about it for half an hour… So that I could find out exactly what happened, if it’s happened in the past and what the other girls did and said…”

My reflex (and I’m glad I asked) was “Did Lucy tell you anything else about school yesterday?” “No”, said the mother.

You mean to tell me, that Lucy was at school for 6 ½ hours yesterday, and the only thing she told you about was the 5 minutes in which she felt unhappy... And you indulged her?
She was at school for 390 minutes; 385 were positive, 5 were not. And you spent half an hour talking about those 5 minutes?
Simple Math would tell me that by talking about 5 negative minutes for half an hour after school, that you then also spent 39 hours talking about the 385 minutes of positive experiences she had? No? Wait, you spent NO time talking about the positive aspects of her day?
It was just 5 minutes out of 390, and we've allowed that minor incident consume Lucy's thoughts?

Well, of course I didn’t actually SAY any of that, but I was certainly wishing I could have. Of course Lucy's mother and I then spent 15 minutes talking about the incident; her telling me every detail 3rd hand. We discussed the usual where we can go from here, how we can work together to make sure Lucy has a positive lunch experience, etc. Apparently being excluded from the game had completely turned Lucy off school and she didn't even want to come in today. I wonder why? Let's not forget that Lucy has been sent the message that if just 5 minutes out of 390 are negative, then that's what we focus on.

Sadly, now the 5 minute incident has been given 30 minutes of air time at home and an extra 20 in my office, and still those other positive 385 minutes have received no mention. I wonder, as the parent in the situation, how might Lucy's mother have approached this whole situation differently? When her daughter got home and inevitably told her about the lunch time incident, could the mother simply have said something along the lines of, “Oh well, these things happen, but next time you might try ___. Now, most importantly, tell me about your FAVOURITE part of the day!” Might this have totally changed Lucy's perspective?

Here's a Teachling Tip - Kids will inevitably tell you first, about the part of their day that they didn’t enjoy. This is because they are still developing their 'emotional filters'. They let negative thoughts consume them. The way adults respond can make all the difference. Next time your child tells you about a negative incident that happened to them, will you indulge them, or redirect their thoughts to the positive? Remember than the incident was probably just 5 minutes out of 390... It seems silly to pay too much attention to the negative.

-       Teachling

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